Parting Words of Wisdom in How2 Format (See, I Told You There Would Be a Second Part)

How2 Shop: Don't. Mall clothing is gross and other stores will just sell you the cheapest of goods for the same amount as elsewhere. If you really want to chuck some cash on material possessions, consider purchasing a bottle of Tokaj dessert wine.

How2 Avoid Losing $: Buy a ticket for every ride you take. Keep your bags close and your paranoia closer: you can never be too "safe" when riding the metro.

How2 Get Laid: There's little or no chance for this. Locals go to bars with friends and when I asked about meeting new people, they scoff, "why would I go to a bar to meet some sketchy Americans when I have my own friends?"

How2 Be Happy: Open your eyes and take in the view. The architecture is beautiful and the scenery is more so. A walk along the Danube is sure to take you breath away and there can't be anything more romantic than watching the sun set from atop Fisherman's Bastion on Castle Hill.

How2 Avoid Getting Peed On: Careful where you sit at the fountain on Margaret Island. Small children like to relieve themselves there. The giant shooting geyser must be a diuretic or something.

How2 Meet Hot Skater Boys: Lots of skaters use the sleek, flat surface of Heroes Square and the pipes at Elizabeth Square (by Gödör Klub) to show off their skills. Just sayin'....

How2 Be Amazed: If you go to one museum in the city, check out the Museum of Applied Arts. The floors of delicately crafted, gorgeous knick knacks will keep you awestruck for hours.

How2 Order at the Bar: Contrary to popular belief, most people in Budapest do not order wine when out on the town. Sure it may be a bit cheaper, but you're also getting about an eighth amount of alcohol as you would with a stein of beer. Keep it simple—whatever's on tap.

All right friends. That's all I've got from Budapest. Keep checking my blogs as I head to Prague early next week! SZIA (see-ya, in Hungarian. Nope, I'm not kidding.)