Nothing peeves me more than "5 Things To Do" lists. Thus, I have ironically constructed a list designed to combat the desire to make lists. More simply, here are the best ways to relax in a city that has more parties than a particularly factioned representative democracy.
1. Sit by the Danube.
This is obvious. Rivers have an evolutionary calming effect on humans; if you are near one, you are more likely to have children because you know they won't die of dehydration. Not true, but for God's sake, if rivers aren't calming, then why does every white noise machine have "babbling brook" as a setting?
But seriously, the Danube is a river that the Hungarians feel the need to light up in its magnificent splendor. Humor them and hum some Strauss while you're reposing on a bench (another great thing about Hungary is that they don't make their benches purposefully uncomfortable to deter homeless people).
2. Go to the ruin pubs, but then find your own hole-in-the-wall.
If you're in a hostel during the torrents of spring, inevitably there will be a call to wander the nightlife scene's Garden of Eden, Erszebetvaros, in search of ruin pubs. These graffiti-bedecked nostalgia centers are "buzzing" with old men and a sea of jostling tourists, but after your nth beer, you'll want to say farewell to your army of hostel friends and find a quiet place to watch the sun rise. When the bells of St. Stephen toll, you'll see the truth that first light can bring as you sit (perhaps on the Danube, perhaps across that river in the trees of Buda, or perhaps on Margit Island in that stream) in silence. To Have and Have Not.
3. Go to a Place of Worship. And Just Sit There.
Don't take pictures. Don't walk around to every little idol or devotional spot. You don't even have to believe in a deity/deities. It's a truth universally acknowledged that abbeys (and parks) can be persuasive in convincing you that you need some alone time. It just makes sense. Especially if your name is Elizabeth.
4. I'm not going to sabotage myself.
Obviously, my list is so superb that I simply have no desire to continue bastardizing the literary works of people worth a hundred of me. My next entry will be entitled "5 Ways to Crush Your Self-Esteem in Budapest." Maybe it will get picked up by the Huffington Post.